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Weapon of Mass Instruction

I am a weapon of mass instruction... Well, I was, but not any more! During my teaching career, most of my students were aware that if they said anything spectacularly stupid (and therefore funny), at best it would be written on the board so we could all continue to have a laugh, or at worst be written down in my planner to be remembered. It was common knowledge that I was going to write a book about all these things and make my fortune when I left teaching. One of those things has happened - I'm still waiting for the fortune part.

I wrote my book, and have begun the torturous process of trying to find an agent and get it published. No luck on that so far, but there are options to pursue yet. In the meantime, I'm going to put it up on here a bit at a time, just to get it out there and hopefully get some interest in it.
Note: I've asked permission of those people I could contact about using their names in the book. In other cases, I've changed names or used initials.